Cheikh mat: Is ‘failing repeatedly’ good for mental health ?

Back to step one: Veni, Vidi, and not even Vici…

And here it goes again, in a very abrupt way, I lost my job abroad, and had to come back living with my parents in France.

Each time I try something, I undeniably fail. For a while, I thought someone put a spell on me. STUPID you can think.

I have now plenty of time for netflixing and so, living my life by proxy.

BECOMING by Michelle Obama, the first documentary I watch on Tv since my return.

Cheikh mat

And it is all I can’t bear: selling fake hope.

Is working hard and believing, enough to have a successful work career? By that, I mean money, passion and respect from your workmates.

Why don’t we say to children there will be tons and tons of other factors to consider when building a “successful”career? Factors we can’t even manage. By the way, what should we consider as being a successful career? Stability? Good salary? Perks? Proper balance between professional and personal life ?

Today, when I woke up, I checked the devil lair called Instagram and another observation I made, it is full of people trying to mentor other people. Not even certified psychologists. And full of platitudes too. Here’s what I read:

• Never give up: Giving up, in many cases, permit you to find another smoother and easier way to reach your objectives. And why staying stuck when the situation is presenting no exit? Just give up! Better than knocking your head against the wall…
• Go out from your comfort zone: What about if you’re ok and settled? Why would you go for an hypothetical joy when you already have it? Wanting for more when you already have can be very tricky sometimes…
• Failing is ok, it’ll make you stronger: Indeed, it is very ok. However, the more you fail, the less you want to try again (and that’s fine). Probably because you get tired not seeing any lights after the tunnel while you did many efforts and sacrifices. Vicious circles you can think. When you lose twice, you’re more likely to lose again… Just because of a tainted mindset.

Sometimes it is probably wiser stop having silly high expectations or even running after the impossible. Because life is about timing and destiny.

I just keep on asking myself, why trying to do the best when living in a mediocre world? Why not being mediocre like everyone else? At least, it seems easier, right ?

I still do think positive psychology can be really toxic. Please, let people live their feelings. There’s a time for hard moments as good ones too, but each of them has to be fully felt and lived.